Meet MH

Our baby girl was born on Tuesday morning. Sorry I just haven’t gotten a chance to update sooner. Hospital stay was filled with some drama with breastfeeding issues, supplementation, weight loss etc.

She was born 5lb and 1oz, 19.5 inches, was smaller than thought, the last US showed closer to 6 lb. Any how she lost 10% of her body weight by day 2 so we had to start supplement.

I am back home now and she is doing good, still using SNS to supplement at the breast so she can gain weight faster. My milk finally came in yesterday but still flowing slow so I am struggling and feeding is a team work right now. Hubby will go back to work tomorrow and I don't know how I am going to manage. She is very irritable with just the breast since it is not flowing as fast as she wants. I am drinking and eating as much as possible so we will see how this progress. I am also pumping and I am on the verge of giving her the bottle and just continue with the pumping.
My back is out and I am tired from too little sleep but that is to be expected. I have so much respect for all mothers out there :). This little girl is kicking our butts but she is the cutest thing ever. I will update more when I get a chance.

Baby m h is here thank you for your prayers, will update soon

Possibly in Labor

On Sunday baby dropped. I finally experienced the sleepless tossing/turning nights that pregnant women complain of. Tonight before bed I started having cramps. Try to sleep it off but walk up within an hour so I have been up since 1am. It feels just like menstrual cramps and now it is about 5 min apart and I just lost my mucus plug, showed up all tinted with blood so it seem like the show has started.
My Doc. said to go in to the hospital if I experience contractions 1min apart every 5 min for at least 30 min. Since baby hasn't turned head down this is going to end up in a c-section so I don't want to wait too long at home but I don't want to go there and be told it is false labor. My section is scheduled for Thursday. The contractions are painful enough that I can't sleep through them but they are not the worst cramps I have had so I am thinking this is very early labor.
Surprising I am too calm. Hubby on the other hand is not so I haven’t told him that they are coming 5 min apart so he is drooling away as I type this. I am going to monitor my condition for the next 1h and make a decision.

Please pray that all goes well. Will update as soon as I can.

No title

I finally have accepted that baby girl most likely will not turn head down this late in the game and I am OK with it. I am sure there is a reason and at 38wks there is not enough space to move around but if she does decide to turn last minute that is fine too.

My c-section is scheduled for next Thursday, 3 days before my due date and I am at peace with it. I have packed my hospital bag with all necessities. This week will be my last week at work, I have a lot to do so maybe I will work from home on Monday. I need at least a couple of days to unwind and sit still and wait for my baby.

Last week I had another measurement done and baby has gained a little over 1 lb. I am over the moon. I think baby was fine all along and I know I wasn't eating enough in the 2nd trimester hence the growth slowdown. But since I have started eating more she has been gaining at ever measurement and everything is normal. I get the feeling that all the screening and US was just done out of being super careful. Once you are considered a high risk they just want to do everything. I am glad the service is provided but I am tired of the three day a week Dr. appointments but they are finally coming to an end.

My OB doesn't want to attempt turning the baby either, he said it was not worth the pain and usually not successful. I asked him about it but I had already decided that I wasn't going to consider it after I read a little on the subject. No reason to take the risk and also pain.

My biggest worry is breastfeeding and I know it may be harder after a c-section so praying that all goes well.

DH bought me an I pad and I am loving it. It will be easy to read blogs while I am recovering.

36wks & Terrified of the C word

Thank God for the three day weekend coming up. I need the rest. Earlier this week I kind of crashed, I would come home from work and take a long nap but after a couple of days of extra sleep I am feeling much better.

Baby is still a breech and I am begging her to turn. After going through two laparoscopy surgeries and the painful recovery especially of the 2nd surgery, I just don't want to be cut. I am terrified of C-sections and also feel like I am going to miss out on the experience of being able to go to labor and birth normally. I know I know what matters is a healthy baby and health Mama at the end of it but I need to deal with the emotions that come from not having it the way I imagined it would be. I am 36wks 3 days and the chance of baby turning is slim. I can happen but most likely not I guess. I am doing the slanted positions to get her to turn but I don't want to do anything that is painful or may hurt baby or bring on a labor. She needs to stay in as long as possible since she is small. The fetal medicine specialist says if she is still a breech by end of 38wks we will be scheduling a C-section for 39wks and I am trying to slowly accept my fate and get used to the idea. After all this is the greatest thing that has happened for us and giving birth naturally is a small part of it. I am now going to the fetal specialist twice a week to check for blood flow to the baby and measurements every two weeks. Everything looks great except for her being on the small side.

I left work early today and had lunch/dinner at a nice restaurant with my hubby. There were a few people with babies in the restaurant and hubby and I couldn't stop staring. He is going to be such a great Dad.

My mom will be sleeping in the spare bedroom which will eventually be the baby's bedroom. We have bought a new bed and mattress and making it so cozy so that she stays longer when baby comes :)

I bought the M.ed.la breast pump, so expensive, why does a stupid pump cost $300. I won't open it until it is absolutely needed in case I have to return it.

A co-worker told me she just found out she is pregnant. They weren’t planning on having a second just yet and she is a little overwhelmed. A friend of mine is also pregnant after two month of giving birth. After hearing both news I couldn’t help but think of my infertile self. I am so trilled for them but I was a little jealous even though I am caring a baby myself. Once infertile always infertile I guess. I think of how deeply I would be saddened if I was still waiting for my turn and I heard both announcements.

Hope you all enjoy the long weekend. I sure will be spending it in bed J

Quick Takes

1. I am now seeing the fetal specialist Dr. twice a week to check blood flow to the baby. Every two weeks baby is measured. Yesterday she measured 4lb 4oz, still small but gained about 9 oz in two weeks, still on the low side of gain. I am a little freaked out by what the cause of growth restriction but hoping I go full term so she can get a little bigger. I am hoping she gains at least 2lb in the last 4wks. Hoping that all goes well when she arrives.

2. Eating constantly have been a challenge since I am limited to what I can eat but I am really trying. Plus I don't crave much of anything except bread which I can't have.

3. I am so excited that my due date is coming soon and I am also nervous. I am so lucky to have my mother staying with me for a few months. She may also end up taking care of the baby for a few months after I go back to work.

4. I am struggling to focus at work; I am all geared up for a baby and not very motivated to go above and beyond for my job. I have a few deadlines that I need to meet before I go on maternity leave plus hire for a temp position to replace me, haven’t put that much effort in to that either.

5. Physical I am doing well, a lot better than a few weeks ago. I just can't believe how easy this pregnancy has been.

6. We have bought all the essentials but still need a few things so one more trip to the store is necessary. We also need to clean up our house and put everything in order.

7. Sorry this post is all about baby, I can't think of anything else right now.

Slowly Approaching

My due date is slowly approaching, only a little over 5wks to go and that is if I make it that far.
My last scan showed all is good, baby is still small but growing. She hasn't turn head down yet and the technician had a nerve to say "this looks like a C-section baby". The scan was at 34wks, what makes her think that the baby would not turn over the next 6wks. I just ignored her comment. I hate people throwing the C-section word as if it is nothing and the normal thing to do. If baby doesn't turn by 36/37 wks I will attempt the exercise that they recommend on some of the birthing books I bought.

Walking has been challenging and I am starting to wobble but for the most part it is my knees and my soles that are hurting.

My co-workers had a baby shower for me, it was really nice. A few people know our struggle with infertility and the messages on the cards were so touching and it makes me happy that people are really excited for us. We got a lot of cloth and some big items. I still have a few items to buy, sheets for the co-sleeper and a few minor things but we have all the essentials now.
Sometimes I think of this blessing and remember where we were last year when I was having a hard time recovering from surgery. I thank God ever day for this experience.

I see the excitement on DH's face and it just makes me even happier. He is going to be a great dad.