1. Earlier last week I was feeling really crappy. I woke up one day and just felt irritated and depressed. Being on cd 12 or so I was baffled. I was mopping around for a few days and full of anxiety for no reason and bam, I started spotting on cd15 and the anxiety and depression lifted. The next day AF was here. Yes I had a 15 day cycle, I should have suspected this since I only had fertile CM right after AF for only two days. Welcome premenopause or what ever this is. My last few cycles were long like lasting 40 days. I think my body is trying to reset after the HCG injection a few months ago but it could also be this is my new normal. When I took estrogen pre-ovulatory in the spring the same thing happened. I had a couple of long cycles and a 16 day cycle followed by two text book 28 day cycles. Then I took the HCG injection and things haven't been the same ever since. Lets just hope that things will reset and I will be back to regular cycles.
2. I have been thinking about what options I have medically in dealing with the endometriosis pain. Premenopause could last years so I need to look at my options now that having another child looks out of reach. Hysterectomy is not a good option for me since the endometriosis pain is localized outside of the uterus. I don't have a lot of bleeding or intolerable premenstrual cramps. What makes my life hell is the pain especially during the ovulatory phase. I don't think I want a complete hysterectomy, I think removing my ovaries at this point is a no no. So my options are limited. My pain level is gradually getting better since I am off estrogen. I am trying to clean up my diet as much as possible and see if that makes a difference.
3. Most days I am OK with not having another child but some days it hurts. When I got pregnant last summer I was hoping for a girl because I wanted my little girl to have a sister. But recently I have dreams that I am holding a baby boy or when I see a baby boy I have this weird feelings. I don't know where this is coming from.
4. This weekend I did not do so good with keeping up with the anti-inflammatory paleo diet. We went to California kitchen and DH pointed to the option of gluten free pizza and I just had to have it. Well the curst tested like cardboard and couldn't eat much of it after the 2nd slice. I also consumed sugar in my coffee and cream. I have been doing so good with adding extra veggies. I am not into raw vegetables so may be I will share a few of the simple recipes I use for veggie dishes.
5. I rarely get colds or flu. Like may be a cold every two years. Last time I had a flu is back in 2005 I think. So I was talking to my cousin who always gets what ever is going around and she takes care of herself more than anyone I know. I was telling her that for whatever reason I rarely get colds. That afternoon I felt kind of off and my throat felt scratch. Next morning I woke up with a cold. So I took it easy for a day and by the next afternoon I was feeling like myself. I better not say this thing out loud. I have enough sickness as is, don't want to add to my misery.
I swear I commented on this post a day or two ago. I wonder where my comment went? LOL. Anyway, I'm sorry you're in in pain still so much. But you're just like me about getting sick. I think it's my autoimmune disease, but I almost never get sick. But with AF, we're complete opposites. I finally started AF on CD51. Lame. And oy, I'm in a lot of pain this time. Ugh. I believe in dreams. I hope yours come true. :) I just can't give up yet. We'll see what happens as time goes on.
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