Update

1. I am so excited that the warm weather is finally here.  I bought toddler MH a water table that I put out on our deck and while I sun bathe she has been content with it for hours

2. Potty training, oh boy.  I was actually excited about the whole potty training thing.  When I thought MH was ready in the winter it was too cold to try the training and I figured she  needed a little more time.  So for the last few months we watched potty training videos, read books and I took her to the restroom with me and time and time again said goodbye to Mommy's pee.   As the weather finally warmed up on a Monday morning three weeks ago we started.   We first watched a potty video she liked on YouTube.   We then took off her dolly's diaper and said goodbye, dolly peed on the potty then toddler peed on the potty after about 30 min of sitting on it.  She was excited, I was even more excited with the idea of saying goodbye to the money sucker diaper.    She was trilled with the task of dumping the pee in the toilet and flashing.  We sang, danced, clapped and she got a sticker and a cookie.  We did great the first day.   She had a few accidents but when it happened she started running towards the potty which she would eventually fall since we have hardwood floor and she slipped on her pee.    Day 2 we were a little distracted by unexpected visit from family (a usual occurrence).  However, we tried our best.   On day 2 when she had accidents instead of running towards the potty she just sat on her pee.  She was scared of falling, and before she slipped, she would sit on the pee and spread it on the floor with her hands :(.  Mommy wasn't too happy but I kept my cool.  After all it was only day 2.  My goal was to have her trained in a week. Hahahahahaha
Damn those videos that say they trained their kids in a day or three.  By day three no poop happened in potty.  Little girl was holding to it, so out of fear of the greatest constipation, I put a diaper on her after dinner and she went behind the side of our living room sofa as she usually does and did her business on the diaper.  So I said she is not ready for #2 to happen on the potty so I backed away from insisting #2 happen in the potty. 

Day 3, 4, 5,6,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,25.  By the third week she figured out the pee thing and would sit on the potty to pee.  She is running around without underwear the whole day but she has accidents if we don't insist she sits on the potty.  I keep repeating, "pee in the potty" but I am exhausted but seeing the improvement I am encouraged.  This week we have been focused on #2, just telling her that it needs to happen on the potty but no show yet.  We shall see.   

3. Moving away from all things potty; since I decided that I will give HCG a go, I was waiting for a sign of ovulation but none was to be seen.  On cd16 I started cramping which I thought weird.  Then I remembered, last cycle I only spotted brown stuff for two days, right after that I had fertile CM which I thought was odd but it disappeared a few days later.  So 16 day cycle, I had a full period with a good amount of bleeding which reminded me of the old days.   The cramps were brutal though and I blame the red meet I have been consuming after Easter.   Time to take it out of my diet.

4. Lets just say, family drama has been at the highest this season and I am praying and hoping that everything will work out.  I hate early morning and late night phone calls.   I get so anxious that someone is going to tell me one more bad news.  My sister called me yesterday after 10 pm, one more bad news to add to the list.  It could have waited until the morning but no she has to ruin my night.  It took me a good hour to fall asleep and I walk up multiple times during the night.   Having a large family for the most part is a blessing but it is also hard since you have to hear of everyone's problems.  It is draining emotionally.

5.  My hubby has a few days of before the summer session  classes begin so we plan to go out and enjoy the warmer weather.   We shall see how I do physically.  I am in the first part of my cycle where the pain is at its worse.

HCG might be my new friend

Last week my hubby and I drove 2h to my Napro appointment.   I pretty much expected that another surgery would be recommended due to my increased pain.  I reminded my doc that the last surgery gave me some relief but I still continued to have pain shortly after the surgery.  I also reminded her that of my family history of early menopause and that I was at an advanced age and the reason for the light period is may be due to age.   So at P+7 I am going to have a blood draw for a test to determine ovarian reserve and see if I am indeed approaching menopause.   She also suggested post peak HCG may help with building endometrial lining and I may respond to my own hormones better than taking the estradiol.   This will avoid aggravation of the endometriosis by eliminating external estrogen.    She also said HCG will help with the PMS.   So I said I will take a prescription for HCG and will discuss with my husband if it good idea.   I am not too positive that it would help with the lining but the possibility of it helping the raging PMS I am experiencing recently have me interested. 

I came home that day and was reading up stuff on line on HCG and found this
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15690968.  It is a study from 2004 claiming HCG might help with endometriosis pain.   Although I am not too keen of injecting myself it may be beneficial for me to at least try it for a couple of cycles and see how I respond to it.

A few days after Easter I was hit with the worst PMS ever.  One day I walk up and felt off, you know the kind of off feeling that has you brace yourself for what it is going to bring.  I was fighting the feeling of just feeling utterly crappy the whole day when I finally gave up and just sat and sulked.  I took it easy for a few days.  By last Sat I was feeling better and spotting brown stuff and waiting for AF to start.  AF never showed up, all I got was brown spotting for 2 days.  Just wonderful.  The brown bleeding may be what ever residual stuffy from the hysteroscopy.  I had bought those cheap HPT tests so just to make sure I tested for the next three days.  Mind you we are avoiding so at the off chance that it may be possible to get pregnant on P+4 action hahaha, yea.   So the problem is my boobs hurt a little, I am seeing fertile CM at cd4 and a little nauseated at night.   I have no idea what my body is trying to do.   The last few days I feel great.  No pain, no blotting and just feeling good.  Just enjoying the easy ride after the awful feeling from last week. 

Hoping HCG will give me some relief